Larry the Ale Guy

We must admit we are thrilled about the latest news alert we received on the internet. It turns out that one of the great comedic minds of our time has decided that it wasn't enough to simply tickle our funny bone on a regularly basis, but now has decided to delight our taste buds as well.

Comic genius Larry The Cable Guy has decided to take a break from revolutionizing comedy to try his hand in the world of commercial beer distribution. Git-R-Done beer has been launched and will likely be available in stores shortly. It was formulated by SchillingBridge Winery & MicroBrewery, located in the small town of Pawnee City, Nebraska, the Cable Guy's hometown. Imagine that: a beer that is going to be cultivated in the same place where Larry himself cultivated his own genuine homespun rustic persona and "regular guy" sensibility.

But sorry, Average Joes, if you're looking for a lesser brew, you might just have to pass this one by. As the brewer says, this light beer will be made with ingredients that have more "flavor and body" than your average commercial brew. It's a light lager, which might be a bit difficult for any old Joe Sixpack to acquire a taste for. (Although, as you can imagine, the internet is already abuzz.) Brewmaster Mike Schilling said, much like Larry's comedy, "Rednecks love quality, too!" [Ed's note: Tell us something we don't know, Mike!] I just hope that no one steals this beer recipe like some hack comedian named Dan Whitney stole his comedy routine.
There is, of course, precedent for this type of celebrity endorsement. Many of us that were born in the 1950s remember Billy Beer, the beer created for Billy Carter, brother of President Jimmy Carter. Billy Beer was sold in cans, and though sales were woefully disappointing, may of the cans can be found today on eBay and in thrift stores. Billy's legacy lives on, though his beer does not. Nor does he: he died in 1988. But I would have to say that the reason that Billy Beer probably didn't sell is because beer drinkers can spot a fake. Although Billy Carter was born in Plains, Georgia, he wasn't a real redneck. His brother was the president for the love of Pete! And southern beer drinkers can spot a fake from a mile away.

That won't be a concern for Larry the Cable Guy; he's the genuine article. If the beer has as much integrity as Larry himself, I think we can all agree that it will make its way into our refrigerators by the gross. What's the brewery's marketing strategy? I think I'll leave it to co-owner of the brewery, Sharon Schilling. When asked whether they could use Larry's likeness to market the beer -- since he is notoriously protective of his intellectual property rights, only associating with the highest quality of products -- Larry said, "'Let's git-r-done,'" Sharon Schilling said. "He made it sound so simple."

And if we had to make a guess, we'd have to say that it will be simply wonderful.